I have pledged to focus my attention on my spirituality I have a strong bond with Nature and know it Loves Me guides me and is much stronger than the narcissists. I realized this on October 3 when I just wouldn't keep trying to find answers for my insomnia which lasted now since June I know a huge part was reengaging with that evil narcissist. It made my prolactin levels high and I couldn't sleep. I bled today from my anus bright red blood from the stress. I know I will be led to the right place I just have not been getting there going places out of fear. I need to go out of desire and bliss. I will try to do that EACH DAY. But for now I will adopt a dog. pLEASE nATURE SEND ME A HEALTHY DOG LIKE gOOSE OR Wolf andI focus on my connection with You and the meditations. I have no people support yet but Nature will send me healthy people. not being able to sleep has been scary but I know that letting go completely to loving Nature not a battery of doctors who have no idea what they are doing and refer to each other for separate body parts is ineffective. ALl illness is caused by stress and this stress being abused by narcs is the worst anyone could handle. I will be great I have travelled the world alone successfully: more than 50 countries. I graduated cum laude and master's magna after being torn down by them a defenseless child. the fat dumb one was punished. his own grandson committed suicide to get away from him. His are weak He did not destroy me. N0o one can. I was picked for so many things based on all my talents by the world I am loved it was only by the demons I was hated due to their jelousy. Mediocrity mobs and scapegoats the star. Jackie and Totsie coulod see I was a the star they called me "stardust" the rest of the family was SO jealous. But I remember the truthful ones, may they be happy wherever they are. All of you in my life who helped and did not harm may you have peace and joy. I am halfway through the crisis of contact I will keep walking proudly.