Kev2012
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Hobo's Great Adventure (part 3)
Title: House of Satan's Son
Author: Kevin Martin
Rated: 18+ (violence and graphic descriptions)
Author's note: Couldn't sleep so wrote this, no offence if you are relegious. Very raw, just finished now, needs editing but i got work, talk to you all later.
He wasn’t sure how long he had been asleep for, but when he awoke it was like Groundhog Day had struck again. For the second time today the Hobbit pensioners were gone, Hobo let out a groan “this is worse than looking after babies!” he said with a mumble as he got to his feet. But this part of the adventure was over relatively quickly. In the distance he could see all 6 of the pensioners making their way back to him, they were moving at quite a pace, considering the way events had panned out thus far today Hobo was surprised that their hearts were still ticking! But it was his heart that was tested moments later. The Hobbit pensioners arrived before Hobo, each with beaming grins on their wrinkly faces. Finally one of them moved forward, holding something delicately in his hands.
Time seemed to stand still as Hobo looked down, he had seen books, seen sculptures, dreamt of this day over and over. But today, held in a pensioner’s trembling hands, was the real thing, the finest mushroom known to Hobbits, Boletus Edulis. Hobo was speechless, after all that had happened today, for things to reach this pinnacle was just too much to take. He was motionless for a good fives minutes.
During this time the pensioners talked for a few minutes, before seeming to come to a conclusion and they all shook hands with each other. The pensioner holding the mushroom lent forward and took Hobo’s hunting dagger from its sheath. Hobo didn’t flinch. Slowly, and very deliberately, he cut Boletus Edulis into 7 even pieces. Each of the Hobbit pensioners took a piece, and finally they gestured for Hobo to do likewise.
Hobo was instantly awoke for his daydream, he exploded in shock. “WE CAN’T DO THIS,” he screamed, “you all know the laws of Hobbit Town, we’ll be hung if the Mayor finds out we found Boletus Edulis, and didn’t bring it back to him!”
“And how will he find out?” one of the pensioners said, a smile on his face.
“We’ve fought wars to keep Hobbit Town safe,” said another.
“We have more right to eat this mushroom than the Mayor.” interjected the third.
“He just sits in his hole dictating orders,” moaned the fourth.
“Plus if you don’t say a word.” chirped the fifth.
“Neither will we.” said the final pensioner, gesturing for Hobo to take his slice.
Hobo pondered for a moment. We will all be hung, he feared, but the Hobbits are right, they had more reason than the mayor to eat this mushroom. He looked to each of their glistening eyes, they looked infinitely younger than the bodies their were attached to. None of them would tell, nobody else was here, nobody else knew. Finally he said, “I won’t say a word.”
Together all 7 Hobbits devoured their piece of Boletus Edulis, the taste was everything that it was made out to be. All the legends, all the tales, all the books, they were all right. Boletus Edulis is the greatest mushroom in the world.
Not a word about Hobo’s adventure was ever spoken, and all 6 of the Hobbit pensioners lived long, prosperous lives, 1 even became the first hobbit to live for over 100 years, living until the grand old age of minus 3. As for Hobo, he held true to his vow, he became a good Hobbit, got fitter and done good deeds. In his later years he even got elected Mayor of Hobbit Town, and it is said he was the best Mayor the town ever had.
Copyright of Kevin Martin 2006
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Apr/29/2007, 8:53 pm
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