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WhatincriminysHappened
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Re: Openness of My feelings leads to My Happiness


Oh (((((((((((((((((Gabs)))))))))))))))))))

I'm sure you may feel uncomfortable with me hugging your sweet self, but, I'm going to anyways.

Your sister is in denial. She NEEDS to feel her Momma loved her and accepts any discount to herself. Children all react differently to abuse. She most likely will never get it Gabs, but, the way she speaks about you....says it all.

I have four siblings. My eldest, whom was the Mom, was stoic and never allowed reality to seep in.

The second was deeply harmed by the n mom who told her she was crazy all of her life. Good to know she's on her path to healing. She's a bright lite and has worked hard and I sense peace in her.

Then, there's me. The no chit taker who fought back, whom btw was the one n Mom picked on the least.

Then my younger sister. She's got her master's in psych married to a physically abusive and verbal abuser. I am sick everytime I'm around them. She was n mom's beating post above everyone. She even stated, she reminds me of me.

My youngest bro, poor babe, has FAS and lives in delusions of grandeur. He's the only child that speaks to her. He says God is love and he forgives her. He is my only sibling that gives me grief and guilt trips.

Kinda like your sis. After Dad died and he stood at burial and said, I barely knew this man and disrespected our Dad so much, I stayed silent. I stewed Gabs. How dare he? My Dad bent over backwards trying to help him accept his disability. Dad called me often so frustrated trying to help him.

So, his last lamblast email of how I was not investing his inheritance correctly and how we've all made him a black sheep, did not rest well. I told him exactly what I thought of his graveside speech and how dare he idolize a mother that molested him and my nephew and stand and spit on our Dad's grave.

I told him I would not tolerate anymore of these emails and what he chooses to do is with him, but, let him know where I'm at.

Do I believe this fell on deaf ears? Most likely....did I voice and state my boundaries? That's all that matters.

Gabs, we did not choose our FOO. We were stuck and helpless. We are not now. I know you know all of this, but, you're still the girl who rightly looked to her family for love, acceptance, and nurture.

So, girl to girl......let the wingnuts whirl. We have lives to live and we aren't "stuck" anymore. We get to choose.

Love you and it's good to see you talking and putting the feelers out. This is the only way out....through and out.

---
Accepting reality is the touchstone of mental health.

~ Anna Valerious
Jun/7/2009, 3:58 pm  
 
butterflylove
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Last edited by butterflylove, Jul/7/2009, 6:04 pm


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If anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town. Matthew 10:14
Jun/7/2009, 9:29 pm  
 
butterflylove
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Last edited by butterflylove, Jul/7/2009, 6:06 pm


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If anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town. Matthew 10:14
Jun/24/2009, 6:46 pm  
 
OVERIT09
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Re: Openness of My feelings leads to My Happiness


.

Last edited by OVERIT09, Sep/1/2009, 7:43 am


---
"People who know and feel what happened to them in their childhood will never
want to harm others."
Alice Miller
Jun/24/2009, 9:20 pm  
 
butterflylove
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Last edited by butterflylove, Jul/7/2009, 6:08 pm


---
If anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town. Matthew 10:14
Jun/25/2009, 5:59 pm  
 
butterflylove
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Re: Openness of My feelings leads to My Happiness


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Last edited by butterflylove, Jul/7/2009, 6:08 pm


---
If anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town. Matthew 10:14
Jun/25/2009, 7:05 pm  
 
butterflylove
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Re: Openness of My feelings leads to My Happiness


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Last edited by butterflylove, Jul/7/2009, 6:09 pm


---
If anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town. Matthew 10:14
Jun/26/2009, 8:26 pm  
 
KyraJames
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Re: Openness of My feelings leads to My Happiness


Gabby, I felt every single word that you wrote there, I really did. You have found your voice sweetheart, no matter if those people that you have the most to say to will never hear it. WE hear you, and we feel what you have been through, and we know the person you have become. You are a beautiful person Gabby, very wise, very loving... and no matter about those people that are blind to you, they never deserved to know the person that you are if they cannot see. We cannot be molded Gabs. We are who we are, and besides undoing the abuse that has been done to us- we will return to our natural state- the person we are has always been inside us, waiting to come out and beam like the sun. You are beaming sweetie.

Do what makes you happy Gabs. If Florence or Paris will make you happy, then one day when you are ready you can look out of your window and see those sights everyday with Lady Di by your side. Let that image, that soul wish be inside you and keep it with you and treasure it. Because this may just come to pass when you are ready to make the jump.
I see my future Gabby, and I hold it in my heart everyday- that beautiful little barn conversion, a little vegetable patch, my little counselling office, my little dogs running all around me- and my bungee jumping trip- it's all the things that my soul craves, comfort, serenity, tranquility and the opposite, but something that I wish to do feel- excitement, adventure, exhilaration. I know, that one day this will be my life. But, I know that it is something that I have to work towards myself, and it is also something that the Universe may gift me when I am ready. But, for now, it keeps me going. I know one day that the chaos and drama, and hurt and pain will be behind me and it will not be part of my future. This will happen for you Gabby.

Love you Gabs.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

(((((BIG BIG HUGE HUGS)))))) emoticon emoticon
Love Kyra xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx emoticon

Last edited by KyraJames, Jun/27/2009, 10:08 am
Jun/27/2009, 9:18 am  
 
butterflylove
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Re: Openness of My feelings leads to My Happiness


Kyra,

((((((((((((((((huge Hugs))))))))))))

You are a kind soul and strong emoticon emoticon emoticon

I have so much admiration for you Kyra, I know it hurts everything that you have been through, yet you have so much resilence, so much courage. emoticon emoticon

I wish for you Kyra everything you want and deserve to be fullied and in my heart and soul I know you will have it. As you described what you want your life to be, I saw that in my head, I pictured you sitting in your barn conversion, looking out the window, enjoying the peace and tranquality and having that career that your soul longs for emoticon

Thank you for sharing that with me, that means a lot to me.

And for me Paris and Italy keep me going as well. emoticon

Love ya emoticon emoticon emoticon

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If anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town. Matthew 10:14
Jun/27/2009, 4:05 pm  
 
butterflylove
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Re: Openness of My feelings leads to My Happiness


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Last edited by butterflylove, Jul/7/2009, 6:09 pm


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If anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town. Matthew 10:14
Jun/28/2009, 11:20 am  
 


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